Not the real Beatitudes!!!

THE DEVIL’S BEATITUDES

Blessed are those who are too tired, busy or disorganised to meet with other Christians on a Sunday each week:
they are my best workers.
Blessed are those who enjoy noticing the mannerisms of clergy, choir and elders:
I can see their heart is not in it.
Blessed are the Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked:
I can use them.
Blessed are the touchy:
with a bit of luck they can even stop going to church.
Blessed are those who keep themselves and their time and their money to themselves:
they are my missionaries.
Blessed are those who claim to love their God at the same time as hating other people:
they are mine for ever.
Blessed are the troublemakers:
they shall be called my children.
Blessed are those who have no time to pray:
they are easy prey to me.
Blessed are YOU when you read this and think it is about other people and not yourself:
I’VE GOT YOU!